Goodfellas 1 vs 4 Fortune FC

<p>It's another round of ESPN's Football Focus the show which brings you deep, analytical insight into the complex world of seven-a-side football and now here's our host John Dykes.<br /><br />John Dykes: Good evening everybody and welcome to another edition of Football Focus the show that brings you, well you've heard it all before haven't you?&nbsp; Let me introduce to you are stellar panel first up the manager of Arsenal football club Arsene Wenger.<br /><br />AW: Hellooo, well John I didn't zee ze incident.<br /><br />JD: We haven't even started yet.<br /><br />AW: Just practicing.<br /><br />JD: And joining him is Man. Utd managed Alex Ferguson<br /><br />SAF: That's Sir to you pretty boy!&nbsp; And remember I'm owed a Chateau Neuf de Pap after this is all done.<br /><br />JD: Yes sir.<br /><br />AW: You knooow, you should be more polite to zis host Alex, it shows a distinct lack of soul in your character.<br /><br />SAF: F&!k youse Arsene!<br /><br />JD: And finally we have Liverpool manager Rafa Benitez.<br /><br />RB: Jes<br /><br />JD: Rafa, put down that pie.<br /><br />RB: Oh Jes, sorry.<br /><br />JD: Paul Masefield was supposed to join up today but he died in an unfortunate accident.&nbsp; He fell into a vat of mayonaise and ate himself.&nbsp; Apparently his last words were 'hmmm I taste like beef'.&nbsp; Anyway on to our match goodfellas vs fortune.&nbsp; Let's run through the line-up.<br /><br />AW: Weeelll, Pepsi started in goal and zere waz Darryl and Parker at the back, Jeetu, Jason and Oka in ze midfield and Bear or Spenny up front (i theenk) in a 2-3-1 formation which gives the team a strong 'W' shape between the midfield and defence.<br /><br />SAF: Ah see that's where they went wrong, going with that 'W' thing.<br /><br />AW: What do you meeean?<br /><br />SAF: Well 'W' is the first letter in the name 'Wenger' now how can you trust a system like that?&nbsp; <br /><br />AW: Zat makes no sense!<br /><br />SAF: What do you mean?&nbsp; Hoighty-toighty professor Arsene doesn't think it makes sense?&nbsp; I have to question your intelligence Arsene.<br /><br />AW: Stop it, you are trying to play ze childish mind games with me.<br /><br />SAF: F*%k youse Arsene!&nbsp; And Rafa put that burger down!<br /><br />RB: Oh, Jes, sorry.<br /><br />JD: Anyway gentlemen, let's have a look at the first goal, it came in from a corner from Jeetu and Darryl leapt like a young salmon to head the ball into the net, Rafa your thoughts on the goal?<br /><br />RB: More mayo please, huh? oh jes, it was a good corner by heetu, jes? He put it right on a plate for Darryl to head it into the net...mmmmm plate.<br /><br />AW: What you did not zee on the zideline was Adrian jumping even higher after Darryl scored ze goal.<br /><br />SAF: I'm surprised you saw that Arsene,&nbsp; but Adrian did jump to the moon and back, if I didn't know any better I'd say the boy was in love with Darryl.<br /><br />AW: Yes Darryl, be afraid, be very afraid. <br /><br />JD: And now on to the equaliser a ball that was lifted into the box and Fortune's forward nipped in and dinked a header over Peps and into the back of the net.<br /><br />SAF: Clear offside!<br /><br />RB: Jes, but no there're no offsides in 7-a-sides.<br /><br />SAF: F&pound;$k youse fatboy!&nbsp; Clear offside, no argument! Now where's my gum?<br /><br />JD: So um one all there then came the second goal for Fortune.&nbsp; So Sir what do you make of that?<br /><br />SAF: *chew chew chew* to much space *chew chew chew* given to the lad *chew chew chew* had time to put the shot away *chew chew chew* and it squirmed under the keeper's body *chew chew chew*<br /><br />AW: I did no zee ze incident.&nbsp;&nbsp; Actually I deed but I am contractually obliged to say that at least twice on camera.<br /><br />SAF: *chew chew chew* this gum is going off *chew chew chew* need more.<br /><br />JD: So, two-one at the break.&nbsp; There were a few subs that came on, Alex Mc came on up front, Thariq came on for Jeetu on the right, Bear went in goal and Peps came out into midfield.&nbsp; we go on to the third goal for Fortune and a well constucted goal too.<br /><br />AW: Well, yes zey passed theee ball around very confidently, much like Arsenal, and zey probed and probed, much like Arsenal...<br /><br />RB: Jes, but they actually took a shot and scored in the bottom corner, unlike Arsenal, haha jes I made the joke funny no?<br /><br />AW: F%&k you Rafa.<br /><br />SAF: *chew chew chew* That's an absolute disgrace *chew chew chew* cussing a good man like that.<br /><br />AW: What? but you did it too! <br /><br />SAF: *chew chew chew* What're you on about Arsene? *chew chew chew* I'm an honourable man who treats other managers with respect *chew chew chew*<br /><br />RB: Jes<br /><br />SAF: F$%k youse Rafa and put that hotdog down!<br /><br />JD: The Fellas did have a few scoring opportunities of their own though.<br /><br />AW: Tim Parker had a couple of headers on goal, Alex had a few shots...<br /><br />RB: Jello shots?<br /><br />AW: Uh no.&nbsp; <br /><br />RB: Oh, shame.<br /><br />AW: Alex Mc had a few shots on goal, one which skimmed the top of the bar and Pepsi took on a few from outside ze area which ze goalie did well to save.<br /><br />JD: But the final goal came from Fortune again.<br /><br />SAF: *chew chew chew* well they had a shot well saved by bear *chew chew chew* and pushed onto the post *chew chew chew*<br /><br />AW: But ze ball rebounded in.<br /><br />RB: Jes, very unlucky...now where's my dessert?<br /><br />JD: So the final score was Fortune 4 Goodfellas 1.&nbsp; Any thoughts on the game?<br /><br />AW: Well I theenk zey are still getting used to playing competeetive 7-a-side games.&nbsp; It will take zem a while to get used to it but zey look like zey will get the hang of it sooner rather than later.<br /><br />SAF: *chew chew chew* actually 3-1 cause one goal was offside *chew chew chew* anyway the ref was a disgrace he *chew chew chew* he clearly didn't add enough injury time *chew chew chew* I calculated a good 90 minutes on my watch and Rafa!<br /><br />RB: Jes, Jes I know put the banana split down.<br /><br />JD: So that about wraps it up for this edition of Football Focus I'd like to thank my guests, Arsene...<br /><br />AW: Merci<br /><br />JD: Rafa<br /><br />RB: *Burp*<br /><br />JD: And Sir<br /><br />SAF: F^&k youse!<br /><br />JD: Thank you all and good night.