Old Parmiterians 2 V 4 Maidonians F.C

A chucklebrothers promotion......

Old Partmiterians vs Maidonians

18 Sep 2010

3-4

He was trying to be brave but there were definitely tears in his eyes ‘they are starting the game without linos’ . Yes Bob had turned up already changed in his kit, like a 10 year old for his first training session, and was now faced with the first of many bizarre decisions by referee Matt Lucas.

We were still trying to digest the Manager’s increasingly worrying behaviour. Yes, he had bought along new boy Dave to play.......in central midfield. Perhaps he had finally got over his centre-mid allergy that had turned him hairy all those years ago. The mind wandered back to the list of promising players who he had never called again for just uttering a preference for THAT position.

After a 3 mile walk to the pitch, the game finally commenced, but almost immediately we found ourselves 1 nil down. Their tall, strong centre forward went straight through 3 or 4 half tackles to register in quick time. Two words were being passed around on the touchline.....White.....Notley.

We were under pressure for the first 15 mins, but Belly, Jason, and new boy Dave were starting to come into it. Jeff, looking like a young Brian Blessed (good spot Noel) was as always, hurling himself around like a rag doll, Then, a trademark rocket of a free-kick from Mr Cheese, via a small burn mark on a defender’s thigh, and we back all level. 1-1

5 mins later and a good ball from new boy Dave, was followed by a savage push from the defender and Tony somersaulting his way to a penalty (I gave it a 6, Matey thought 5.8). Johnny Mann coolly dispatched in the corner. 1-2

Bob had finally been given a flag by this point having made several phone calls to the Lino arbitration service. His lightening arm was not really needed though and a good ball from Belly found Mr Cheese who neatly finished for his second goal. 1-3

Unbelievably though, there was still more to come before half-time, when Mr Cheese topped off a fine hat-trick with a sort of floated shot over the keeper from some range. Proving there is more to his game than a 220 mph scud missile. 1-4

Although we had played some good stuff, the score did seem a bit flattering. Matt Lucas obviously agreed and awarded them with a penalty for a push by the invisible man. Timmy boy accepted it with good grace though. 2-4

The second half was less eventful; either that or I had run out of space on my post-it sized note pad.

Noel (‘I’m not meant to be here today’), came on and proceeded to tell the centre forward, the left winger, and the referee how he was definitely not meant to be here today.

Wattsy, who had made some good saves, parried another but they managed to somehow bundle it in to give a few tricky moments towards the end. 3-4

Chris, defused speculation that he was a changed man, by refusing to reorganise with 5 mins to go, in order to shore up the victory. ‘I can’t change it now ‘ he protested. Quizzical looks all round.

Old Parmiterians 2 V 4 Maidonians F.C

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