Waterloo vs Business School F.C.
2 - 1
26 September 2020 · Liverpool Old Boys Amateur Football League<br>Division 3
Away league match played on 26 September 2020.
Kicked off at 2:30 PM
2-1
vs Waterloo
Away league match
The Boy Naylor has denied all claims that he was juicing in the lead up to a Herculean performance at the Civil Service Ground today! He dismissed reports he had used a home enema kit to insert EPO and other performance enhancing drugs up his virginal hoop, as lies, damned lies and untruths!
The Business School Back Four of Birdman, Birkett, Naylor and Timms were solid from the start and castrated the Waterloo forwards into a toothless attack! In the onion bags the baby faced Messiah Will Ellison delivered to us like Moses delivered from the River Nile had little to do except strike a pose and Vogue! Let your body move to the music, come on Vogue! But in a textbook case of COLLECTIVE MASS AMNESIA the midfield proceeded to abandon ticcy tacca and hit long balls beyond their ability. Domestiques KNOW YOUR LIMITS!! It wasn't until Ben Peach came on as sub that some calm descended on the BSFC. After giving birth to Leopold Peach III only two weeks earlier Peach Snr put down the boccy and showed his new found maturity to pass the ball short, sharp and to feet. Up front Roberts was constantly being tugged back while Richman went lame afta 5 minutes and looked ready for the glue factory! Against the run of play the Waterloo potheads hit a cross from the left which held up in the air before being headed into the bottom corner. WATERLOO 1 - BUSINESS O! Jacob 'DON'T CALL ME LANCE' Naylor started the fightback weaving his way doggedly past 5 players ( without the aid of growth hormones, cortisone injections or steroids) before being grievously cut down in a leg breaker of a challenge! RED CARD!!!
HALF TIME: - WATERLOO 1 - BUSINESS 0!!
The second half saw Peach, Bibs and Doherty playing neat passing triangles to bypass the 10 men plebians of Waterloo. But for the third time in two weeks Ellison was outdone by an unstoppable looping cross come shot! WATERLOO 2 - BUSINESS 1!!! Two minutes later everyone's favourite sweeper Joseph JAZZIE B swept through the field like Bruno Tonioli dancing the paso doble at Blackpool Tower. He sent a diagonal ball to Popeye Doyle who rounded the wanderlust keeper to hit the ball into an empty net! WATERLOO 2 - BUSINESS 1!! The siege of Drummond Lane was ON. Master Tactician Coach Larkin shuffled the pack and for the last 10 minutes Ellison played on the half way line setting up chance after chance in the Waterloo box. But alas The Economists could not find the equaliser their endeavours deserved!!
FULL TIME: WATERLOO 2 - BUSINESS SCHOOL 1!!
STOP PRESS:
NAYLOR JNR ENJOYS POST MATCH COFFEE ENEMA!! (EXPAND PHOTO BELOW)
CLUB DOCTOR ORDERS GOUT VICTIM NAYLOR SNR TO CUT BACK ON PORT, OYSTERS AND SNORKELLERS LUNCH!!!
BEN PEACH TALKS TO MARIE CLAIRE ABOUT CRACKED NIPPLES AND THE JOY'S OF PARENTHOOD!!